ColemanMedia Report

Adaptive Brand Marketing and sophisticated predictive modeling algorithms failed to foresee the paper cut suffered by Senior Media Buyer Seth Fogelberg early Tuesday while reviewing impression delivery reports, according to several witnesses at the scene.  Fogelberg, who employed the forward-thinking marketing tactics after attending a CMO round table discussion at Ad:Tech NY last week, expressed disappointment that predictive modeling hasn’t predicted much of anything.  ”I think all this ‘adaptive marketing’ fluff might just be a huge load of BS,” said Fogelberg.  ”None of this stuff has predicted what our target customers will do, how many times my client will change their minds at the last possible minute, or who’s gonna take the lead in my fantasy league this week.  They also failed to warn me about how freaking hot my coffee was this morning.  Worthless!”